no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
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