just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
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