Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
Randomize
