google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
