That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize
