when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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