I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
Randomize
