Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
