Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
Oh no. Did we do a blood oath again?!
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize