is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
Randomize
