Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
He eats kale on the regular. Do I look like a bitch that wants to eat kale. No. Give me some Boston market.
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