You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize
