What a fucking waste of an outfit
i need an iv and a liver transplant
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
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