It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I'm her ex, so unless you're interested in her massive moral failings and open season vagina, I'm not your guy.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize
