this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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