So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
It's just like the Real World with babies
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
