Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
at one point he was caressing me in the kitchen asking me my name over and over again and then asking what my favorite continent was
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
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