can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
Randomize
