I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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