I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
the man who designed bathrooms to have toilets within easy puking distance from the shower is my hero
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Randomize
