I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize
