"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize