he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
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