Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
he told me I talked like a deaf person
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Randomize
