are you still at the devil's house?
Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
I swear, you have an app for that. "Attention: your boyfriend is pooping. Place call?"
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
She calls me Shortcake and bites my ear. Trust me, I'm FINE with bein the secret lesbian lover.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Randomize