Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
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