For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
after we had sex he told me his original plan was to have sex with my roommate but his buddy likes her so i was backup
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
Randomize
