I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
