Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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