dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
