this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
