worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
