so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
I knew it would get worse when I said I think your roommate is watching and he looked over at him and said ... So?
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Randomize
