ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
Boobs speak an international language.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
