I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
did you just describe your masturbation session as "rad af??"
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
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