I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
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