I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Randomize
