Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
