somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
