I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
Randomize
