dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
only if we run a train.
done.
Just tried to put my sweatpants on backwards...the chances of passing my physics exam just went down about 100%.
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
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