just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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