Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
while we were making out your friend starting kissing my toes and all you had to say was "just go with it"
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
