so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
Drunk. I slept-stripped.
By myself.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
