ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
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