Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Randomize