I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
Randomize
