seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
I think my nap took me to another dimension
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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