Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
