I bet he comes in French.
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
We're in a hurricane and you send me a video of you playing with your dick while driving! You wanna die?!
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
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