Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
