she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
